Do you find yourself in a place where you can’t move? Have you realized you are stuck in something or somewhere that is keeping you from moving on?
Most people adore puppies. Just like our young and innocent furry friends, there are times when we end up in situations that we thought would go much differently. It looked safe and fun before, but now it is only frustrating, exhausting, and humiliating.
At times, divorce and separation will produce seasons when we feel that nothing is happening. You can’t get over what he/she did. You are praying for reconciliation, and it seems like all they want to do is ignore and hurt you. Sometimes it involves your children more than you. They don’t know how to process a family that does not look like it did in the past.
When I was little, I always thought that if you get stuck in quicksand, you were going to get swallowed up and never be seen again. Growing up on a farm in North Dakota, little did I know that it was not a huge problem out in the rolling hills and valleys filled with cows. For a while, if I ever saw sand, I figured staying away was the best option. Just in case.
Come to find out, you CAN survive getting stuck in quicksand. What a relief!!
First thing to do is NOT to panic. Realize that the ground you are on is not solid and that you can’t just walk yourself out. The quicksand weighs you down, pulling you under as you spend your energy trying to get out.
Second, you need to change your position. By laying on your back, hands raised and extended above your head and out as far as possible, you are spreading out your weight over a larger area. It changes the effect of your body weight. The quicksand is not actually “swallowing” you up, your weight is actually pushing you down as the quicksand is holding you there. Just like in a pool, a back float helps you to stop the sinking and helps you gain control over the effects of the quicksand.
Third, calmly continue to lay there as your legs and feet started to join the rest of your body at the surface. Make sure you spread them out like your hands, out as far as you can.
All the while, remaining calm will help you conserve your energy to actually get unstuck.
Fourth, make your way to solid ground. If you have another person nearby, they can throw you a lifeline (rope, long pole, branch, etc) to help pull you out. If not, you need to do this on your own. By slowly moving your hands and feet like you do in the pool, work your way to the edge of the quicksand, where the ground is solid. Eventually you will be able to slide yourself back onto solid ground.
If you have made it this far, you may wonder why I went into detail on how to get out of quicksand. Well, think of the quicksand as sin, unforgiveness, depression, or whatever has you STUCK.
- Don’t panic!! It only makes things worse. It causes you to spend your energy on the wrong things and actually makes the situation worse. It causes more of the “quicksand” to attach itself to you and adds more weight to your own body weight that is already causing you to sink.
- You need to change position. You need to lay back and raise your hands. Rest and surrender. Not to the quicksand, but to Jesus. Fully and completely, or else the “quicksand” will just continue to weigh you down. If you are not a follower of Jesus, you can do that right now. Say, “I surrender to you, Jesus. All of me!!”. If you are a follower of Jesus, you need to surrender ALL of you, especially whatever “quicksand” you find yourself in.
- As your weight is shifted, continue to rest as you gain your strength back. Let God give you what you need to make it out. He will give you a rest and a peace that nothing or no one else can give. You will need it because you still have some work to do.
- You need to get back on solid ground. God is that solid ground. He is the one who can take your whole weight and hold you up. If you have a friend who is on solid ground (big key there) is able to help you, let them pull you to safety. If not, you can do this. God gives you what you need (your own hands and feet, obedience, faith) to bring you back to Him (solid ground).
Hebrews 12:1 (ESV) 12 Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,
The end of this verse talks about running the race (our life) with endurance. We need to stay strong with an endurance that allows us to finish. Sometimes that means to rest. Sometimes that means to fight for what is right. Sometimes there is a season where we just need to lay ourselves down and surrender to God.
It also says to run the race with endurance that is set before us. Whatever it is. The rest of our lives are set before us. God is ready and willing to bless you all the days of our life.
We may not have asked or wanted to be divorced or separated. It sure isn’t what God wanted or planned for us as well, yet He will help and guide you as you surrender and trust Him.