Process of Time


It is said that time heals all wounds. In my opinion, the process of time helps the healing process, but that is not what heals. Seeking wisdom on the correct path to fix the issues and following through with that wisdom is what will bring the healing, in the process of time.

If you break your arm, you wouldn’t just say “I’ll be ok. Time will heal it.”. Wrong. You will end up with an arm which tries to heal, but the bones are not set together and held tight by a cast so it can heal correctly. You may eventually not have pain, but you will have an arm that is much weaker and will be easier to break again in the future.

When we gain the wisdom of doctors for physical healing, they know that they must reset the bones as close together sometimes inserting screws to hold them together so that when the body heals (in the process of time) it will be as strong as it can be. It may never be as strong as it originally was, but if healed correctly, it will be usable again and able to withstand whatever comes next.

When we just move on from divorce and do not discover true wisdom on how to heal a broken heart, you are just expecting it to heal. It doesn’t work that way. It is like breaking your arm and not seeing the doctor. You are at a much higher risk of your heart being broken again and again because it never healed correctly.

One of the most vivid images I had when I was struggling through my own healing was what I felt was an open heart surgery. The image was of a huge slice all way from my neck to my stomach, and the scar that came from it. I had given all my hurt, pain, feelings, emotions, stress, and expectations to God and told Him to heal my heart. But it left a huge scar. I have it to this day. The scar of divorce.

Now, before you think that I despise the scar, I see it for what it is. An event that happened. And the scar is just proof of that.

Am I healed? Yes, thank you, Jesus!! Does it still hurt? No. Does the scar remind me of the greatest healing ever in my life? YESSSS!!!!

The scar is not a bad thing. When I realized that the consequences of an open heart surgery to fix my heart was a leftover scar, I came to grips with it. I now see it as a daily reminder of the amazing healing that has happened and that I can now share my testimony of my healing to many others. I can encourage them to know that healing is available, if they are willing to do what it takes to fix the issue (broken heart) not just letting it heal on it’s own. It will never heal correctly and be a heart that will not have the strength to handle the job of pumping life through your body if you don’t get the help you need.

Of course, through the process of time, things seem to get better. My point is that without dealing with the real problems, you will never heal fully and you will be more susceptible to pain and suffering in the future. Going through a divorce is already painful enough. Do what it takes now to make it better later.

It is so great to see people, even after only a few weeks of surrendering to the process and getting real help, experiencing real change that can be seen by those around them. They may not see or feel it, but others can. We are usually the last ones to see and feel the change in ourselves that others see in us.

The process of time will bring forth the healing, as you are faithful to do what it takes to attain healing and wholeness through the One who is the only one that can repair a broken heart. His name is Doctor Jesus, and He knows how to fix your heart.

My heart is healed and whole. It doesn’t hurt anymore.

But I still have a scar. And I am fine with that.

A free devotional called “Divorce to Healing: 31 Days of Healing and Wholeness” is available to all my readers here.

You can order you own copy of the book, “Divorce to Healing: 31 Days of Healing and Wholeness” from Amazon here.

Old Silver Bowl


Have you ever felt used up, old, and forgotten? Do you see yourself as a vessel that held great value at one time, but is now nothing more than an ancient dish?

So many times we see ourselves with a totally different set of eyes than the ones God gave us at birth. Maybe it is because life changes us and makes us believe things about ourselves that aren’t true. We see ourselves in a cracked, scratched, and foggy mirror thinking that it is us who are cracked, scratched, and foggy. At times, we just assume the mirror is fine and it is us with the issues.

Yes, we have issues, but remember that the mirror (your self-image) may not be reflecting the truth about you.

I tell my wife sometimes, “It is not what you say or think about yourself, it is what I say and think about you that matters.” Now, if I am being an asswipe of a husband, then that is not a good thing to say. I am merely explaining to her that how she sees herself and how I see her are through two totally different set of eyeballs.

God sees you through His eyes. Realize that what you see, your perception of yourself and your situation, may be totally off like a cracked mirror. There is a time and a place for being honest and real with yourself, but it usually is about your situation and not about who you are as a person.

If you need to change and improve, by all means, get right. Take the steps toward improving your mental, physical, and spiritual well-being. It matters and it should, just know that the person God made is different than the mistakes you made or what happened to you.

In my devotional time today, I started reading Ezra. (Yes, even after 25+ years of being a Christian, I had to check the table of contents to figure out what page it was on…..pray for me)

This book starts out with the account of Cyrus, the king of Persia, calling his peeps to gather up all the stuff that was given to him when Nebuchadnezzar took the people of Israel into bondage in Babylon for 70 years. It was all counted out to a priest of Judah. Something jumped out at me.

It talks about 30 gold dishes, 1,000 silver dishes, 29 silver pans, 30 gold bowls, 410 duplicate silver bowls, and 1000 miscellaneous items.

Duplicate. Just extra. Leftover. Not usually used. Did you catch that?

Why is that such a big deal? To me it makes me feel remembered by God, of value, made mentioned of.

If a duplicate old silver bowl is included in the greatest and most widely printed book of all time, don’t you think that God valued that old silver bowl enough to have it recorded and saved so that over 2000 years later we can still read about it? It’s just an old silver bowl, right?

No. It is so much more than that. It was a part of God’s house that had been destroyed in Jerusalem and is going to be rebuilt soon. It had value. It needed to be accounted for and included in what God is going to do in the future.

You may be at a point in your life where you have no idea what the future holds, there is no value in what you are going through. You may feel like an old silver bowl.

But, oh… are God’s precious vessel and he has a place for you in what He is building. He wants you and needs you to be a part of it.

God values you enough to mention something as insignificant as an old bowl to show you how much He values you, His own precious child.

He sees you with heavenly eyes. You do not place your own value, because you are His and He thinks you are priceless!!

Come on, old silver bowl. Let’s go see where you are going next. I heard it is a palace that will be absolutely amazing!!

Oh, My Soul

It is amazing how music affects me.

I seem to listen to music based on two criteria: my mood or God’s direction.

Sometimes I feel a certain mood and want to rock out to some upbeat praise or even a good old song from my youth. Then, there are times when God wants me to experience something fresh and new.

I feel like He wants me to share this new song with you today, to help and encourage you while you walk closer with Him.

Be blessed!!

I Have A Heavy Heart

"Nine Minutes After Sundown." Photo from 1,500' over Decatur Island, looking to the Southwest, Lopez Island, and the Olympic Peninsula. Photo by Jeffery A. Lustick

I have such a heavy heart right now.

You think that after almost 14 years after my second divorce that I would finally have the healing and wholeness that God wants me to have. You would think that I would have changed and grown in every part of my life to the point that divorce and all the pain and hurt that comes from it could not or should not affect me any more.

Well,…………I was wrong!! 😦


God has brought me total and complete healing in virtually every part of my whole being. Actually to be honest, I AM completely healed from all that happened to me. But, God saw fit to leave a deposit behind in me. And I am not sure if I am up for the task.

I am sitting here in tears as I am trying everything I can to help a good friend and brother in Christ deal with all he is going through.  I just want to give him a hug. One of those, “It gets better” or “I know because I have been there” kind of hugs. But I can’t.

I pray and pray and pray for God to reveal Himself to my friend and show him that he is loved, by the only One who IS love!!!

I ask God to give me the words to speak life to him. How can a mere mortal, as well-meaning and experienced as I am, compare to what he really needs? He needs a healed heart. A healed soul. Real hope.

What I just realized is that divorce has changed me forever.

God left me with a scarred heart. It is fully healed, but it shows the wounds and the proof of prior battles.

God left me with a tender heart. It is sensitive to the touch for those dealing with divorce. It hurts when they hurt; it bleeds when they bleed.

God has left me with a hopeful heart. It is praying that the only true hope called Jesus Christ can reach you, me, and all those needing hope.

God has left me with a joyful heart. It is thankful for all that He has done in my life; the healing that only God can give and the wholeness that lets me carry on for one more day, living a life of purpose.

God has left me with a heart…………for you.

Pray for my friend as I pray for all of you.

A free devotional called “Divorce to Healing: 31 Days of Healing and Wholeness” is available to all my readers here.

You can order you own copy of the book, “Divorce to Healing: 31 Days of Healing and Wholeness” from Amazon here.



This is an excerpt of the book just released called “Divorce to Healing: 31 Days of Healing and Wholeness” and it was an amazing revelation for me.

You will figure out that you will learn things through your divorce that you mat have heard, but never really understood until now. These revelations can be so eye-opening that it will change your life forever.

As parents, you get the revelation that having kids is TOTALLY different that being around them or babysitting for a friend. You are never ready for it and it is an ongoing learning process that never stops.

As a father and husband, I learn things almost every day about my wife, our children, and their lives that can only be understood after going through them. Looking back, I start to truly understand them as the individuals God made them to be and how my life must adapt daily to make them the wife, son, daughter, and family He has blessed me to be a part of on this earth.

In the excerpt above, i talk about the simple fact that you can be surrounded by people, but feel so alone. The reason that you feel like that is because you are not connected to them the way you need to be connected to them.

You may have great relationships with many people, but if you are not feeling truly connected in a mutually beneficial life-giving relationship, you are not in the kind of relationship that fulfills what your spirit needs.

Take time to be more transparent, more open to those that you trust. Invite them into your world in a deeper way. You will find that the real life in a relationship that changes you and brings forth healing and wholeness is waiting for you to connect on a new level, one that can trust again.

Take a few minutes to consider all the revelations you have come to learn about yourself and those around you, especially since any tragic event. Some will make you angry, some will make you depressed. Yet again, many will show you that there are things you needed to work on in your life in order to become a better person in many areas of your life.

This is not to make it seem like all the problems are/were with you. It is just getting you to see that there is more potential and growth because of what happened. Don’t waste this chance to see all that will cause you to become more than you have ever been.

It is there. You just need to recognize it, learn from it, and growth through it. You can do it.

What revelations good and/or bad have made you a better person. I would love to here your thoughts.

Be blessed!!

A free devotional called “Divorce to Healing: 31 Days of Healing and Wholeness” is available to all my readers here.

You can order you own copy of the book, “Divorce to Healing: 31 Days of Healing and Wholeness” from Amazon here.



Day 1291 Today is my 5 year suicide anniversary

My friend, Tyler Wood, shares an amazing testimony. I believe suicidal thoughts are usually experienced by most people while healing from divorce. Know that God has a plan. Just hang on and get help if you need it. Suicide is not the answer. Tyler is living proof!!

At 7:10 am 5 years ago I sat on a hill in Aubrey Texas ready to finally take my life. Suicide was my only way out. I had written a letter to my ex wife explained why I was doing what I was doing …

Source: Day 1291 Today is my 5 year sucicide anniversary 

The Book is HERE!!

Book Proof

You can now get your own copy of “Divorce to Healing: 31 Days of Healing and Wholeness“!!

Grab yours at Amazon here!!

Thanks everyone for all the kind words and encouragement that helped me to strive and bring forth what God has been wanting me to do for so long.

If you would like to check it out for free, head over to the YouVersion Bible App and see if you would like it. A majority of the book’s content is the same (31 Days), except for the introduction which has my story as well as a list of additional resources I recommend.

Remember, this makes a great resource that you can also give to a friend or family member that may need some encouragement as well.

As of this post at the beginning of Sept 2016, I will be holding a contest on both Twitter and Facebook, if you would like to win a free copy. Head over and join our community there.

Be blessed!!


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